Service with a smile

I've started running.

One thing you notice when you run in NYC is that people don't look at each other. Not directly in the eyes. Sure, they check each other out as a potential predator or mate, but running time is not friendly time. We're on a mission, we've got to meet this goal, achieve this pace.

I found myself getting into the same practice. I'd warm up and circle my ankles, then take off on my route. Whenever I'd pass someone I would keep my eyes on where I was going, my mind on synchronizing my breath and steps (8 steps in, 8 steps out). Use the peripheral to make sure no cars or bikes are about to take me out, pay attention to the sound of my feet hitting the ground (soft like cat). Intensely internal. Then, I started passing fellow runners.

At first, I made tentative eye contact, not wanting to weird anyone out with too much. I've heard it said before that people only look into each other's eyes for longer than 3 seconds if they're going to mate or murder. If we met eyes, I attempted a smile. When you're focusing on all the other things (breath, steps, sounds, cars, bears chasing you through the urban wilderness) the smile really comes out as more of a grimace. Before you know it, you've passed the other person, only showing them that you're pretending to have as much fun as they are.

On my way back, I tried a different tactic. I shifted my focus to what was outside of me. The light, the trees, the path, the people. I made a point to say "Good morning!" to everyone that passed me, whether they had their Do Not Disturb sign on or not. A remarkable thing happened- people responded. They smiled back, or said "Hello". You see, this funny thing happens when you smile- the receiver's body mimics your smile to see if it's genuine. That means, whether it's a self-generated smile or not, you'll still create one in someone else. Smiling has all kind of benefits, science showing links to longer life, stress relief, and happier relationships. I found that with every person I greeted, I felt happier, like I was developing a deeper connection to my community and the world just by smiling and speaking.

Two fringe benefits? My pace back was faster than my pace out, and my voice was well warmed up by the time I made it home.

Next time you go out to practice your thing, do it with a smile. Let me know what benefits you discover.

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/01/25/science/25smile.html?_r=2&src=dayp&
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-science-willpower/201208/smile-your-way-out-stress

Why I teach yoga #1

I teach yoga so people will walk up the stairs faster. When you take time to practice asana, your body starts to connect everything together in a better, more intuitive way. What was once a body trapped in a rigid, habitual posture lengthens out to a free, open being.
As things get unstuck on the outside, so too within. You learn that anything is possible, and take time to rekindle the artist's voice within. You may start to set goals and achieve dreams you'd put away long ago. The pull of those dreams (or my telekinetic push from behind) will have you bounding up the stairs like you did when you were a kid, excited to explore the next opportunity.

Why I love yoga #1

Yoga makes me flexible. Bendy. Gumby. I never thought I'd be able to fall into a full split at any time of the day, get my leg behind my head, or wear my feet as a hat. Through constant practice, I did, and I can.
It wasn't just physical practice; it was retraining my mind to believe that I could relax my body into this shape, or engage my muscles to create that one. You have to see it, believe it, then you be it.
That's the real gift. Understanding that yoga can make you flexible in the body and the mind is great. Knowing how to set a goal, work toward it, and achieve it or not, that's world-changing.

Choose your Rituals

Per usual on Wednesday afternoons, I was cleaning and restocking in the back room of one of the stores where I work. I To make me feel like I'm doing something meaningful, working my mind as well as body, I was scanning through a backlog of articles on NPR Science to find something interesting to listen to. "What Makes Rituals Special" with Shankar Vedantam popped out at me.

Listening to the program break down the definition of a ritual (a ceremony with a series of actions performed in a prescribed order), and list common rituals that many people in Western society have made me realize- I'm a ritual-making-machine. Those funny things you do because you were taught "this is how you do this"? Rituals. The way you prepare your coffee/tea/mixed drink? Rituals. Obsessive-Compulsive-Disorder? It's just a person getting stuck in their own ritual, like a computer program caught in an infinite loop.

There's no clear answer why rituals are so special for us, but there is scientific evidence to show they are powerful. When we perform a specific series of events and expect a certain outcome, the mind is primed to look for examples of that outcome. If "having a good start to your day" means: waking up at a certain time, washing, eating breakfast, and having a cup of stimulant, any day you don't do those things, your mind won't be watching for the "good" things throughout the day. It missed its ritual.

This is the purpose of yoga class. You learn to explore how your inner space is organized by exploring how your outer space is organized. The teacher shows you a series of specific movements that are linked together to strengthen and open up your body for an advanced pose, and by the end of class you've got it. Or at least you have a better picture in your mind, or series of steps you can practice to better realize the pose in the future. Each time you practice, you come closer to the "perfect form" you've created in your head.

Why should we create and practice rituals? Rituals are your yoga practice. They are daily mindfulness. For me, performing an action in the same way over and over stills my mind so I can think clearly. I know that by engaging my core muscles and finding the straightest spine in this moment, I'm building a pattern that my mind will follow for the rest of my life. Like a flowchart. We perform actions in every moment. Why not take the time to choose your rituals and create your life?

Read the articles that inspired the entry:
(http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=why-rituals-work)
(http://n.pr/145glDz)

Less of the ME, more of the WE.

As a teacher of any sort, it's easy to get caught up in your lesson plan, your impact, your personal contribution to the cause. That'll fuel you for a while. It may even earn you accolades and acclaim. At some point in all of this focus on the singular, you discover you are still alone. You're teaching your method to yourself instead of the students or souls you set out to guide. To create a true legacy in your lifetime, focus less on the ME, more on the WE.

One human can only do so much. You're limited to silly constraints like the 1080 minutes in an 18-hour day, and to being in one place at one time. When you take on a mission greater than what you can do by your self and your life time, you've got to tap into the rest of humanity to make it happen. The more friends you have, the bigger your community is, the more people there are to support you in whatever way they can. (Remember, sometimes someone who knows how to act is just as important as one who knows how to not act.) With a tribe's knowledge base and worldview to draw from, a lot can happen in a little amount of time.  

The next time you have a conversation, see what you can do to support that other being living their dreams. You might be surprised how furthering their dreams furthers yours.

Your Time Savings Account

Wealth is not how much you spend, it's how much you keep. Often we hear people express this when talking of money. I've come to understand, in these past weeks leading up to and including my wedding, that it applies to time as well.

To become rich in money, pay yourself first. That's the secret of every financial book ever written. When you get paid for something, put a percentage in a savings account you do not touch. When you discover time free from work in your planner, schedule yourself first. Focusing on completing that extra degree? Book time to study. Have a goal to be closer to your family? Meet them for a walk, a Google Hangout, an AcroYoga or cooking class. This way, your time is yours; it doesn't get eroded by television or random internet trolling. (Remember when it was called surfing?) These things are at best an illusion of good use of your time at worst an incredibly addictive drug.

When you take time back for yourself, you quickly realize how valuable it truly is. Are you spending it doing what you love, with the people whom you love?

Why do we do it?

There are three practices happening simultaneously throughout your life, whether we're aware of it or not- practice with the body (asana), practice with the breath (pranayama), practice with the mind (dhyana). In most yoga classes, physical poses are the focus, with occasional mention of breath here and there. You're lucky if you find a class in NYC that adds in meditation at all. What's backwards about this? Meditation is the whole point.

My practice began as a child. While learning Hap Ki Do, before we focused on kicks, self-defense moves, and sparring, we sat and meditated. I had no idea what I was doing. The only coaching given was to let go of everything that had come before practice, and prepare for the present. When it was time to move, breath was primary, movement was secondary. We first learned to yell (ki-yai) at the execution of a technique to drive more energy through the body by engaging the core muscles. Only after we could yell properly did we learn the physical movement. The practice ended every evening with a brief meditation.

In yoga class, the purpose of asana is to learn how to keep your spine straight so you can sit in meditation for longer. The purpose of pranayama is to learn how to control your breath so you can sit in meditation for longer. The purpose of meditation? Manifold. At this point in my life, it's to turn the six senses back into one sense- pure awareness. When you spend time with no filters on your mind, you gain the ability to create your own filters and choose who you are being all the time.

Now that you know what us yoga teachers are really preparing you for, we can let you in on the real secret. Whether class is specifically devoted to meditation or not, you can choose to be meditating all the time. Difficult transition from crow pose to headstand? Meditate, recording all sensation as information. Person next to you is totally cute / smells funny / making up their own class? Meditate, and choose how you are being in this moment. After all, life is just a collection of moments. Wouldn't you rather choose to be happy in all of them?

(Curious about other benefits of meditation? Come to my class! Contact me through my website for a first-time private class deal, just for reading.)

If you needed even more evidence, just read what these guys have to say:
Wikipedia: Research on Meditation
Huffington Post - Meditation Benefits
NY Times - How Meditation Changes the Brain